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Guidelines for Dealing with Students in Distress |
There is no one correct way to deal with a student in distress. Each person has his or her own style of approaching others and differing capacities to deal with problems. It is important to know your personal abilities and limits. If you decide you want to intervene and try to help a distressed student, or if a student approaches you to talk about personal problems, here are some suggestions:
- Request to see the student at a mutually agreeable time when there will be an adequate period for extended discussion. Ask to meet with the student privately. Meet the student in a relaxed, private setting (for example, a professor's office).
- Speak directly and honestly to a student when you sense that he or she is in academic and/or personal distress.
- Ask if the student has the support of family or friends, with whom he or she is able to talk about the problem.
- Tell the student why you are concerned in an open, direct and non-judgmental manner. Describe the behaviors or symptoms you have observed without making interpretations or conclusions. (You might say: "I've noticed you've been absent from class lately and I'm concerned.") Be specific and give examples based on what you have seen.
- Allow the student to respond to your concerns. Listen to the student's thoughts and feelings in a sensitive, non-threatening way. Let the student know you understand by repeating back what the student has told you. Try to include both content and feeling. (You might say: "It sounds like you're having a hard time right now" or, "I can see it is hard for you to discuss how you feel.")
- Try to help the student fully express and clarify his or her feelings and thoughts. (Some examples: "Have there been any changes in your life?" "It usually helps to talk about how you feel." "If you don’t feel comfortable talking to me, perhaps you would find it easier to talk to a counselor, privately and confidentially.")
- Avoid judging, evaluating or criticizing the student, even if he or she asks for your opinion. It is important to respect the student's value system, even if you don't agree with him or her.
- Behavior that is strange or inappropriate should not be ignored. Comment directly on what you have observed.
- Do not discuss your concerns with other students.
If you are concerned about a student's suicide potential, ask if the student has a plan for exactly how he/she would act on these thoughts, when and where the student intends to carry out the plan, and if he/she has ever attempted suicide before. You need not be afraid to ask these questions. For people who are considering suicide, these questions will not furnish them with new ideas.
- Decide how you can most effectively help the student. Can you provide direct support to help the student resolve these problems? If not, call the Student Counseling Center for suggestions. If on the Garden City campus, the SCC may even be able to come to your location to help out.
- Be aware of your own tolerance limits. If you are uncomfortable talking to the student, call the SCC to help you.
- Some signs you may have overextended yourself include:
- feeling stressed or overwhelmed by the situation
- feeling angry at the student
- feeling afraid
- having thoughts of "adopting" or otherwise rescuing the student.
Overly Agitated or Enraged Student in Your Office
Students who are overwhelmed by their feelings may act in an overly agitated or enraged manner. When you encounter such a person, try to do the following:
- Allow the student to express his or her feelings and do not attempt to use logic to calm him or her down. A few supportive comments from you may help.
- Do not ask too many questions but try to ascertain the facts of the student's distress.
- When the student has calmed down, make a referral to the Student Counseling Center for additional help as soon as possible. If the student does not attend classes on the Garden City campus, the SCC can assist students with counseling referrals in other areas. The Derner Institute's Psychological Services Center also offers therapy services at the Manhattan Center (516.877.4820).
- If on the Garden City campus, try and get student to walk with you to the Student Counseling Center, University Center, Room 310. If the student refuses, call Public Safety (dial "5" from any Garden City campus phone or 516.877.3511). On the Hauppauge or Hudson Valley Centers, call the SCC (516.877.3646) for suggestions or for local referrals. If you are at the Manhattan Center, call either the SCC or The Derner Institute's Psychological Services Center (516.877.4820).
- If the student does not regain control while in your office and the situation becomes a crisis, call Public Safety for help (in Garden City, dial "5" from any Garden City campus phone or 516.877.3511). If you are at the Hauppauge Center, call security at 631.300.4367. At the Hudson Valley Center, call the main office at 845.471.3348 or 911. At the Manhattan Center, contact the public safety desk at 212.965.8340 ext 113 or call 911.
- If there is any indication of danger to yourself or the student, leave your office immediately and call local Public Safety for help. (Do not ignore your "gut" feeling.) On Garden City campus, call Public Safety by dialing "5" from any campus phone or 516.877.3511. If you are at the Hauppauge Center, call security at 631.300.4367. At the Hudson Valley Center, call the main office at 845.471.3348 or 911. At the Manhattan Center, contact the public safety desk at 212.965.8340 ext 113 or call 911.
Overly Agitated or Enraged Behavior in the Classroom
A student's disruptive behavior may be due to different causes, such as fear of failure, an attempt to alleviate his or her anxiety, or a symptom of an underlying emotional disturbance that he or she can no longer manage as the demands on the student become too great. You may ask the student to cease attending your class until they can change their behavior. You may want to arrange a security presence in advance to enforce your request. In addition, an instructor may make a request to withdraw a student from a course because the student's behavior disrupts the conduct of the course. (For undergraduate students, this request would be made to the Associate Provost in the Office of Academic Services & Retention, and for graduate students to the dean of the appropriate academic unit.) You can also initiate University disciplinary action with respect to the student, by contacting the Dean of Student Affairs (516.877.3660).
If you decide to talk to the student about his or her behavior in your classroom, it is important to reassure the student that you want him or her to do well, and that you know that being a student can be demanding. Remind him or her that you are willing to help, while gently asking that the student accept the responsibility of behaving appropriately in class. In any of these situations, you can let the student know of the counseling services at the Student Counseling Center, or if possible and you are on the Garden City campus, you may want to escort the student directly to the Counseling Center (University Center, Room 310). The SCC can offer students from Hauppauge, Hudson Valley and Manhattan Centers local service providers.
If necessary and appropriate, here are some suggestions for escorting a disruptive student out of the classroom or your office:
- Ask the student to leave with you and take him or her to a place where it is quiet and there is protection for you. "I need to ask you to come with me where we can talk." If on the Garden City campus, you may want to escort the student to the Student Counseling Center (University Center, Room 310), or if at Hauppauge, Hudson Valley, or Manhattan Centers, call the SCC (516.877.3646) for suggestions.
- Choose your words carefully. Be supportive but firm. Continue to speak in a calm and reassuring manner, saying, "I'm sure we can work this out," or something similar.
- Initiate the conversation by asking how you can help or by asking what just happened.
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Contact
For additional information, please contact:
Student Counseling Center
University Center Room 310
Adelphi University
P.O. BOX 701
Garden City, NY 11530-0701
p - 516.877.3646
f - 516.877.3139
This page last modified on January 10, 2008.
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